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Proverbs 28
We often hear the phrase, "You are the company you keep." It's a wise saying taught within the scriptures.
The book of Proverbs, chapter 28, verse 7, reads, "...the one who spends time with gluttons and drunks disgraces his parents." The verse is a warning to refrain from harmful behaviors and associating with people who practice them. It doesn't just harm you—it shames your parents and devalues the guidance they gave you.
The verse emphasizes that people often judge you based on the company you keep, implying that you are condoning or adopting harmful behaviors. One might therefore infer that maintaining a healthy distance from such influences is a mark of wisdom.
The point of the passage is to keep a "healthy distance." A healthy distance is the exercise of discernment. This means realizing when the relationship is leading to harmful behaviors and refraining from them. A healthy distance doesn't mean that we are to shun it or isolate ourselves from the individuals involved. It means to ensure that you are not influencing or adopting harmful behaviors. However, if associating with people who practice such behaviors leads you to do the same, then it is a sign of weakness, and so you should stay away from them, because it would be the right thing for you to do.
The book of Matthew, chapter 5, verse 29, affirms this: "If your right eye leads you into sin, gouge it out and throw it in the garbage—for better you lose one part of your body than to march your entire body through the gates of sin and into hell." Ultimately, the focus of the warning is on the destructive nature of the sin itself, rather than judging or condemning the individuals involved.
For example, Jesus met with people whom, during his time, most of society considered a disgrace. The scriptures show a consistent pattern across all four Gospels, involving individuals and groups such as tax collectors, Samaritans, lepers, adulterers, prostitutes, criminals, the disabled, the poor, demon-possessed, Gentiles, and even Roman soldiers.
Because of his association with them, Jesus was often judged as one who condoned sin and was just like them, as the book of Luke, chapter 7, verse 34, affirms, "The Son of Man comes along, feasting and drinking wine, and you say, 'This guy is a glutton and a drunk, a friend of scoundrels and tax collectors!'"
While Jesus walked among those whom society often rejected, he practiced a healthy distance by ensuring he was not leading them into temptation; instead, he was there to deliver them from it. When he was asked, "Why don't his followers fast and give up these sinful behaviors?" (Matthew 9) He told them that as long as he was with them, there was no need to fast. Jesus didn't condone sin, nor did he judge or condemn the sinner.
He was patiently waiting on the heavenly Father's timing. This is what he meant when he said, "The time will come when he will be taken from them." While he was with them, he taught them, “If you try to hang on to your life, you will lose it, but if you give up your life for my sake, you will save it" (Matthew 16).
The fasting described by those who didn't follow Jesus was in stark contrast to the kind of deliverance Jesus offered. They were fasting and giving up behaviors that often led to their judgment and condemnation, and so they quickly turned away from their sins so they wouldn't be judged based on who they associated with.
On the other hand, Jesus' followers demonstrate unashamed loyalty to him and that neither he nor their heavenly father is ashamed of them, and in God's perfect timing they would willingly sacrifice everything they have, even their lives, to remain in him as he is in us, unashamed.
